As a parent loving my children is a given, but what I know for sure is that each one of my children require a different level of love. I’ve talked about this before, but when I was expecting my second child I was afraid. I didn’t know how I was going to love more than one child. This might sound crazy to some, but it was a legitimate fear for me.
I was a parent of one until 2002 when my second child arrived. Beautiful baby boy that came 5 weeks early! I was nervous but as soon as he came, I believe my love vault expanded. True story. Loving more than one child came natural. Who knew that I had enough love inside of me to go around??? Three years later, child #3 arrives and I got this! I’ve got this loving more than one child down pat. The very next year, child #4 arrives…Yeah, I was doing the most, two children within a year was a lot! The Labor & Delivery staff told me they’d see me next year, lol.
Here I was, a mother of four with enough love for all of them. If you parent multiple children then you know that no two children are alike. As my children began to age, I noticed that while I had more than enough love for them all, I had to start tailoring how I loved them. Not more and not less, just the way I loved them.
My oldest was a daddy’s girl, but a mommy’s baby. After I divorced my love had to be tailored to accommodate grief and confusion. She required more of what I like to call my heavy duty mothering love.
My second born, was head strong and extremely independent. He was also a mama’s boy. As a little tike he was a cuddler, and as an almost 17 y/o teenager, he’s still a cuddler. He’s very affectionate and he requires what I like to call smothering motherly love. With him love looks like nurturing, validation, hugs and kisses.
My third born, definitely a middle child. An introvert to the fullest. He wasn’t a child that loved to be held but when he wanted your attention, he wanted your attention. He required the, “I know you love me but I like my alone time mom love”. That “check on me periodically” type love but not too much because it can be overwhelming.
My last born, mamas baby since he exited the womb. Very loving and affectionate and sometimes unsure of himself. He too requires a smothering type mommy love but with a little extra smothering and nurturing.
Understand that this isn’t love with conditions, but more so love with specifics. My best description…The love that I have for each one of my children runs deep and is unwavering. Each child require a different love recipe.
Until next time…🦋