In the beginning of 2018 I joined an amazing church. I joined the church for a few reasons, but the main reason was, the delivery of the word! This man has a way of breaking down the Bible that even a child can understand. He can command the attention of the non believers. He made it fun and exciting. So why haven’t I been back? Great question!

When I made the decision to join church, again, I hadn’t regularly attended church in years! I mean Y-E-A-R-S. Sunday went from all day church to my designated day of rest and relaxation, preparing for the week ahead. Getting back into the habit of going to church has been a challenge, hence me going awol.

If you’re a regular reader of my blog then you know I grew up a PK. My dad has been a Pastor for 42 years. Church was my entire life! Tuesday was Mission, Wednesday was Bible Study. Thursday was Choir rehearsal. Saturday was free clothing giveaway. Sunday was church allllllllllllll day.

I had began to suffer from church burnout. I know some of y’all can relate! I had also become resentful for staying at my parents’ church out of obligation. You’d be surprised at how many PK’s and family members stay out of obligation, while dying spiritually. Afraid of them being mad at you. Sometimes saying no to family can be hard, especially parents! As the only child who still attended, I felt like I couldn’t leave. After all, there wasn’t a place in the church that I wasn’t involved, but I needed more spiritually. I needed to not just be in a place to work. Sometimes the cook needs to eat. After my divorce, and coming out, I finally got enough nerve to stop going. I needed a break y’all.

When I stopped going, the very thing that I was afraid of happening, happened. My mama was mad. She was angry y’all. So much so that on Sundays I wouldn’t hear from her. That lasted a while.

During the time I stopped attending, I searched for churches, and attended a few, but nothing felt right. Also, by this time my thinking had begun to evolve. I had begun reading more. Studying for myself. Trying to understand religion vs. spirituality.

Now anybody who grew up Christian, or let me speak from what I know, traditional southern Baptist, there is no other right religion 🤷🏽‍♀️. There is no trying to understand the point of view of those who don’t believe what you were raised to believe. Here is what I came to learn, there is no respect when it comes to belief systems.

You have the Baptist, the Methodist, the Pentecostal, the COGIC, the Mormon, the African Methodist Episcopal, the Catholics, the Jehovah Witnesses (side note…I appreciate the hustle, but can y’all stop ringing my doorbell at 8 AM? Even Jehovah rested), the Muslims, the Buddhist, the New Thought, the Seventh Day Adventist, and I could name more! And guess what? Everybody believes they’re right. How does another person’s beliefs affect you? What you eat don’t make me 💩.

Is it possible for you to believe what you believe and let others believe what they believe without judgement? Y’all would be surprised at how many “friends” I lost when I came out because according to them, my life no longer aligned with God’s word or their beliefs. I think I’m gonna bring back WWJD bracelets (Kanye Shrug).

Now back to why I haven’t been back to church. Simply put, I wasn’t ready. While I was ready to deepen my relationship with God, the Sunday morning routine was too much too fast.

Who knows what the future holds. One day, I may be ready, I just know that today is not that day.

Until next time…💖

6 Comments

  • Angela Whitmore says:

    Great post. I am at church every Sunday. Only because I work the sound system. I have sat and watched people join and never come back over and over again. I always speculate as to why that is and I would imagine it is similar to your reason. It can be too much too soon. Especially for someone new to it all. As soon as people join they are hit with new members classes, tithing, conference claims and some more. On top of that they are bombarded by every organization to join (more fees). Some people just want to come and build a relationship with the Lord and get drained mentally, physically, and financially before they get a chance to do so. I chose relationship over religion a long time ago. Now don’t get me wrong I adore the members and the clergy at the church I attend. They are amazing people who have helped my family through some of our roughest times. However. I have no intentions on attaching myself to the church or it’s denomination by becoming a member anytime soon. I don’t believe that is my ticket into heaven. No disrespect to anyone who believes otherwise.

  • Mona Norman says:

    You said a mouthful.People may not agree, but it is what it is. Continue with transparency.

  • Jeff says:

    You’re helping lots of folk Stick with it you’re voice and transparency is what is needed…..

Leave a Reply

Instagram

  • New Blog is Posted! What is something you wish you knew before you started blogging? •
I’m discussing the cost of blogging and what you need to know before you start. I don’t think it’s discussed enough! Yes, like many others I did my research beforehand, but there are several things I wish I knew before I started. •
No, I’m not an expert, but I’m sharing the knowledge I do have! Click the Blog link in bio for full blog 🔗 💫
#talkingallthatjaz #blogger #blackmomsblog #blackbloggers #blackbloggersunited #blackgirlswhoblog #browngirlbloggers #melaninbloggers #wordpress
  • This Week On The Blog/Vlog! It’s been awhile so please allow me to reintroduce myself. 💫
My name is Jazmine, creator of #talkingallthatjaz . I’m a Lifestyle Blogger/YouTuber and I post content weekly by way of my blog talkingallthatjaz.net and talkingallthatjaz on YouTube! 💫
I’m 39, reside in the Bay Area with my amazing partner and 4 brilliant teenage/young adult children (still sane, just gray). I work a full time corporate gig...for now, can somebody scream “road to entrepreneurship”?
💫
I would love if you followed me here on Instagram and subscribed to my Blog & YouTube channel! Let’s be friends! Link in bio 🔗
💫
#talkingallthatjaz #blogger #momlife #bayareablogger #blackgirlswhoblog #blackmomsblog #youtube #youtuber #blackyoutuber #melaninbloggers #browngirlbloggers
  • Look Of The Week! As I was reviewing photos I said, “wow, not bad for 40 in less than a month and 4 whole children!” Outfit deets: 
Velour Tracksuit: @forever21 
Shoes: @vans 
Lips: @revlon shade - Va Va Violet
🦋
#talkingallthatjaz #ootd #ootdfashion #fashion #lifestyleblogger #blackmomsblog #melaninbloggers #browngirlbloggers #bayareablogger #blogger #blackgirlsrock #momlife #blackmoms #blackmomskillingit #unitedmelaninqueens
  • New Blog Post! I had no plans on posting a recipe this week but this quick and easy breakfast was too delicious not to share! •
•
This has been my go-to breakfast for a minute and I could eat it everyday! This is my no sugar added smoothie bowl and Cajun Seasoned avocado toast topped with egg whites! Let me tell you, that toast packs a flavorful punch! Click on the Blog link in bio for full recipe! 
Are you a fan of avocado toast? 🦋
🦋
#talkingallthatjaz #foodie #recipes #breakfast #avocadotoast #homecooking #momlife #blogger #blackgirlswhoblog #melaninbloggers #blackmomsblog
  • New Vlog on YouTube! As a parent of multiple children, it’s important to spend 1:1 time with each one of them! Click the YouTube link in bio to follow us in Walnut Creek Ca! Like, Share, Comment & Subscribe! 🦋
#talkingallthatjaz #bayareablogger #blackgirlswhoblog #vlogger #youtuber #blackyoutuber #blackmomsblog #melaninbloggers #browngirlbloggers #blackgirlmagic #blackgirlsrock
  • New Blog Is Up! 🎶 Now Write It Out🎶 Writing is a healthy form of expression and I’m sharing how I Write It Out! Writing for me has been a form of therapy. Click the #talkingallthatjaz Blog link in bio 🔗
🦋
#talkingallthatjaz #blogger #blackbloggers #blackgirlswhoblog #melaninbloggers #momlife #blackmomsblog #bayareablogger #writeitout #writer #browngirlbloggers

Follow Me!

Copyright © IPkabuto 2017 • All rights reserved.
%d bloggers like this: